My daughter is almost 11. I have raised her by myself since she was just turning 4. Lots of people have helped me through the years, whether it was support, sanity, or simply an ear to listen.
I would love to say Anastasia’s mother was involved and there was shared custody, there wasn’t/isn’t though. I would love to say I had a steady babysitter to watch Anastasia through the years, I didn’t though.
It was just me. I watched her, bathed her, cuddled her, tucked her in at night, took off from work and helped her feel better when she was sick, checked the closets for monsters, taught her to ride a bike, etc.. I watched her grow and learn to function in this world.
There is no award or prize at the end of this journey. There is no one standing there every step of the way coaching, aiding or helping. And, thank God, I don’t have her mother filling her head with lies about me or her and I bickering about how to raise my little girl.
I read a lot about single fathers sharing custody and how much responsibility it is. Or how they are trying to figure what’s fun to do with their 15 year old daughter when they get her for the weekend.
I cannot just impress my daughter over a weekend, I cannot just find the coolest thing for her to do when she is with me this or next week. I am turned on ALL the time. I have to be.
My rewards are small and great at the same time.
Today I watched my little girl using common sense to figure out a math problem. She struggled with this problem brought it to my attention and I gave it back to her in a way she couldn’t understand although made her think differently about it. And that eventually led to her solving the problem with common sense instead of brain power. That was my award today, to watch my little girl take one more step to being a full functioning adult in our society. And, even though she has a long time to go and I am definitely not ready for her to grow up anymore yet, I was proud all the same. ;)
