A Single Daddy’s Blog

There are five days left till we leave for the cruise.  I don’t usually panic or worry, although Anastasia is out of school and I am convinced she thinks I sit home and play all day long while she is in school.  I have a new client and a TON of work to get done for them before I go on the cruise and I only have today through Thursday to get it done.  Ugh.  Friday we are all driving to San Diego for embarkation (spelling?).

Any way, I told Anastasia to make list of things we could do this week, so we could do something before we leave.  She scheduled out the rest of the week with no time for me to work.  Guess she’s my travel and event coordinator.  :)

I know it has been a day since I wrote.  Been VERY busy with work stuff.

Today we are going over my older sister’s house.  I called her to see if Anastasia and I could come over earlier so her kids and my daughter could play.  They haven’t seen each other in about 2 weeks, so I thought that would be cool.

She said that was fine to come over early and she needed to talk to me about something.  She wouldn’t say what, although she said it had something to with Anastasia.  Hmmm…  She said she didn’t want to tell me over the phone and she said it would be much better if we talked in person.

I know my older sister.  I consider her my second mother.  She is just like my mom in many ways.  So when she brings something like this up and she is very hush hush about it, I know it’s serious.

Guess I am leaving earlier to go find out what’s up.  :\

To be continued…

EDIT:  28 Sept 2008

As a single father raising my daughter there are plenty of things Anastasia will go through that I will NEVER understand.  My hopes and dreams have always been I would be with a woman that cares about her enough to talk to her about all things ‘girl’ by the time she gets there.

Anastasia’s 10 and a half and I’m still single, still raising her by myself.  So this weekend’s issue, which I will not go into detail about, was more a ’she’s growing up and changing’ type issue.

I realize I am getting to that point where I have to rely on what I have taught her to this point and hope and pray it is enough to get her through.  I will become more a coach than a ‘parent’.  It is so hard to realize my little girl is becoming a woman and there is NOTHING I can do about it.

And NO amount of punishment will stop the process.

<sigh>

I really don’t like that phrase.  “Sorry to bother you.”  Anastasia has told me that about 10 times today.  Most of time it prepended a want or begging of some sort.  She was out with her friend most of the day.  She would text me everyonce in a while and call occasionally.  They were over another friends house, then over a different friend’s house, then they begged to come here.  Then she needed a drink.  Then she wanted her scooter.  Then she wanted to change her shirt.  Then she wanted to go to the church that her friend’s parents volunteer at.

All starting with, “I’m sorry to bother you.”  UGH.  I think she thinks that makes me softer or calms me down.  It doesn’t.

It makes me feel horrible.  Am I that busy that she constantly feels like she is bothering me.  I don’t think so.  Cause I could be working on her computer, or making dinner and she tells me that.

I think it is a new phase she is going through.  Hopefully this one passes quick.

Yesterday was parent teacher conference day.  Anastasia was extremely worried.  My sister was home sick so I decided to leave Anastasia with her so there were no distractions while I was getting the dirt on Anastasia and how bad she has been in school.

All week she has been stressing this appointment.  She was convinced it was going to bad and I was going to mad when I got home.  I thought to myself, “there is no way she could be that bad.”  I mean, even in her worst moments she is better than most kids.

Well, she was crying when I left the hose to go.  :(  I get to the school and the teacher had NOTHING but GOOD things to say about her.  How hard she is trying, how great she is doing and how good she is about making sure all her work is turned in.  The only thing her teacher said was she talked waaayy too much.  Wait, seriously, my little girl?  Talk?  No way!  ;)

In the end, I walked in the house yelling, making Anastasia think her worst fears had come true.  >:)  Then I let her in on the good news that she was doing GREAT!  I couldn’t resist the little toying I was able to do with her.

Today is her last half day before a two week break.  I wonder what we will do next week.  Need to think of something fun!

Any thoughts?

I had a flashback today that I was hoping NEVER to experience again.  After my ex took off, there was another woman I met.  I fell madly in love with her, but wait….I am getting ahead of myself.  When I first met this other woman, who I would end up having a 5 year relationship with, I had a talk with my then, 4, almost 5 year old daughter.

I explained to her that we, the three of us would be going out to dinner and this woman was a close ‘friend’ of mine.  I wasn’t sure she understood the whole girlfriend idea, although I used the word any way.  I explained this woman would not be her mother and she should not talk to her about that either.  If Anastasia had any questions about this subject, I told her to talk to me.

So, the night comes that Anastasia is to meet my ‘girlfriend’ and the first words out of her mouth to her are, “Are you going to be my new mommy?”  Luckily my girlfriend at the time was not too freaked out about it.

Fast forward 5, almost 6 years later;  My relationship that lasted just over 5 years with that woman has ended, luckily she never spent anytime with Anastasia so there was no hardship there. (I say luckily, that was half the reason why I called it quits with her.)

Now I am friends with a neighbor here, she works at the school where my daughter goes and she is a single mother raising 3 children.  We get along very well, I would be lying if I said there wasn’t any interest there, although I have no reason to rush anything, and I think the feeling is mutual with her.

I found out today that Anastasia is telling everyone at her school that she wants my neighbor, who works at the school, to be her mommy and her daughters who are also at the school to be her sisters.

I know, she is just bragging to all the kids, trying to be cool.  Although that puts my neighbor in a bad spot, she works at the school and it puts me in a bad spot because Anastasia is my child running around talking about things she knows nothing about.

I’m sure she doesn’t mean any harm, although she is ten and she should know better about talking like that.

And, oh BOY am I mad.  Not even sure what else to write.